leftcoast's Diaryland Diary

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My thoughts could make me combust right now.
I hate how I feel so much anger, resentment, bitterness, envy and jealousy. I really need to focus on not letting those emotions over come me like they do. They don't do me any good, they don't change anything or make things different.

I'm fully embracing 2013. I already have my list of goals and I'm ready to take on my 12 monthly resolutions. I just need to stay focused.

I need to be okay. I need to be okay on my own. I need to be okay with what is, what was and what will be. I need to focus on making new friends and new beginnings. Exploring and taking advantage of what I have and what's right here.
I don't need anyone right now, and it's not fair to myself to try and fill the void just because I'm lonely.

And I especially don't need to waste my time and energy on people who play me and do not give me what I deserve. If someone really cares or is interested in me they would make the time, they would make the effort. I get that now.

I feel stupid for apologizing to you. I have a feeling that I know what you will be like and what you will say on Saturday, and I think that's mostly why I'm trying to avoid that senario. The last thing I want to be doing is having a drunk talk with an immature guy who doesn't get how to treat a friend.

12:13 a.m. - 2012-12-21

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